Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
