he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
