you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
