Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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