I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
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