We're like a lot better than the average bears
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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