O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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