Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I think people are normalizing furries
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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