I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
