Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
