Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
