found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
