Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
