its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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