used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
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