the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
