Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
