put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
