i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
