and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
