doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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