She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
