I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
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