I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
