Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
