3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
what the fuck happened to the tacos
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
