I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
