I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Randomize
