Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
