Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
