is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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