weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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