Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
