I'm laying in your front yard are you home
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize