She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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