she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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