you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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