I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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