yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
