I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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