Did you just see the Batmobile???
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
