somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
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