paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
You can't just leave with hair like that
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize