Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
