Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize