at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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