return my video game
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize