Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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