I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Pooping to opera.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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