What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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